People often assume that the worst thing a wealthy client can do when they’re upset is shout. But shouting is practically a compliment. Shouting means they still think you're worth arguing with.
In luxury, the true death knell isn’t noise, it’s silence.
And not the peaceful, meditative kind. I mean the cold, echoing silence of a client who’s gone dark after you’ve apologised. No response, no acknowledgement, no furious reply. Just a void.
Most people mistake this for entitlement. “They’re just being difficult because they’re rich.” Nonsense. This kind of silence isn’t a tantrum, it’s a test.
In psychology it's called it a credence test. In luxury it's a kind of posh limbo. You’re not being shouted at because the shouting phase is for amateurs. You’re being observed. Closely. To see what kind of professional you really are when you’re no longer centre stage and the spotlight’s swung elsewhere.
And what do most people do? They panic.
They send four emails, three voicemails and a carrier pigeon, all saying essentially the same thing: “Please like me again.” Which, if you think about it, is just a way of reminding the client again that you messed up.
Luxury clients don’t want your grovelling. They want your competence. One calm, clear apology. One clear fix. And then six months of utterly flawless service, without ever referring to the mistake again.
The apology isn’t the thing. The pattern after the apology is the thing.
I once saw a jeweller engrave the wrong initials into the back of a £70,000 Patek Philippe. The client was, as you might imagine, incandescent. But the jeweller didn’t spiral into email novellas or sobbing voice notes. They fixed it.
Then personally oversaw every single purchase that client made for the next six months, with immaculate attention to detail. The client forgave them, not because of the words, but because of the pattern that followed.
The mistake didn’t cost the trust. The response would have.
Because in luxury, trust is asymmetric. One mistake can outweigh ten successes. And over-apologising, ironically, just tips the scale further against you.
So if you’ve made a mistake, don’t panic. Don’t chase. Don’t over-explain.
Say what went wrong. Show what you’ve done to fix it. Then deliver relentlessly, quietly, and consistently until your competence makes them forget your incompetence ever existed.
And if the silence still terrifies you?
Then luxury might not be the right place for you.
Because in this business, the only real apology is proof.
Everything else is just noise.
See you again next week
Paul
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PAUL RUSSELL | Consumer Behaviour Psychologist - HNW & Luxury Consumers | Luxury Academy | www.luxuryacademy.co.uk
